I remember the days when people on the internet used to proudly show their faces on their avatars. Their profile’s bio used to be more “real” and personal. I still see some of that on old profiles, or on older forums like Hacker News (aka HN) where plenty of people there still arent afraid to put their github profiles and personal websites on their HN bio. That or HN users are using the same username as their other usernames on other sites, making them easily googleable/contacted.
I wonder what’s happened to the internet culture from back then.
I remember the early, electric days of facebook. Maybe early isnt the right word, but it seems so early now that we’re looking back. I first used it in around 2009, I added a bunch of good looking girls my age as my friends, because come on, why not? 🕺🏻🕺🏻
Back then, EVERYONE accepted my friend request. Today, that wont happen, people are more “cautious” online of who to let in to their walled internet gardens.
I’d comment on their posts and like their photos, and we’d begin chatting. I began having a girlfriend from the UK, some blonde girl my age, let’s call her Hailey, it rhymes enough with her name. We began talking about The Beatles as she was into old music, and The Beatles was the only “old” band I knew from then as I was learning to play them on the guitar.
Soon we were calling each other every day. Sounds dumb to have a long distance/internet GF, but that’s how it was back then. We continued it for years, even when I had a “proper” GF we just ended up becoming friends
Typing that, I actually got curious. Where is she now? I believe I never unfriended her on my old facebook account, so I just checked… Opened the messenger app on my mac and…. she’s gone.
It just says “Facebook user.” She deactivated her account. Last time I heard from her was 8 years ago, she was having trouble “finding herself.” I couldnt find her on the net anymore. Dissapeared. I wished I reached out more to her, I hope she’s doing fine. I was a shit friend who at the time didnt knew how to talk to depressed people. I thought the proper thing to do is to give them space to sort themselves out. I didnt realized she was no longer a part of my life.
I scrolled up to see our old messages, all the way to the first, to revisit the memories. And apart from cringing at my adolescent lines from then 🤦🤦 it made me realize how much I have pulled back to my shell. I need to change. One day I know I’ll find her again and by that time, I want to look good, have better experiences
After I wrote those above paragraphs, I reminisced a bit about my interactions with Hailey, it gave me both a realization and a challenge: to put myself out there
We need to be cringe again.
Well perhaps I worded that wrong.
We need to make ourselves be seen more.
Daring to be seen is about more than just showing our faces. It’s about being authentic, vulnerable, and open to connections. Even if doing these things means being “cringe.”
The internet I grew up once had this kind of raw, unfiltered interaction. It’s what made those early connections so memorable. Daring to post that awkward photo, share that imperfect thought, or reaching out to that long-lost friend. The messy, beautiful parts of humanity.
I need to travel again. Learn new things. Get out there and see the world. Have more great discussions. Make more deals and trades.
Let’s touch some fucking grass
UPDATE: June 1, 2024 – almost a year wtf
We reconnected 🤯🤯🤯 “Hailey” now works as an HR at Amazon UK.
So what happened to me 9 months later? It pushed me beyond, met some folks who mentored me some new skills to position myself for this AI boom , reconnected with old pals some we talked business deals and some we joined sports competitions (that’s me with the grey shirt and glasses, with some of my friends), and then I flew to Japan with people close to me, which I’ll soon blog about as well, perhaps this June 2024. And now thanks to making attempts to reconnect, I got another friend who can refer me to Amazon, or wherever she’ll be next. Keep those connections alive man.
